Insomnia on Hood

Rory slams his third (but not last) 5-Hour Energy drink as Hardman and I race to change into warmer clothes while we wait for Tommy and Peter to show up in the Timberline parking lot. It's 11:00pm and none of us has slept for sixteen hours and now we're preparing to summit Mt. Hood.

Having conceived the plan just days before, we were now attempting all of our first ascent of the tallest mountain in Oregon sans guide. I've never even ascended a peak over 6,000 feet.

Burning up the terrain park at Timberline, we were en route to the Pearly Gates via the Hogsback. Within the first couple miles we were greeted by cold shoulders at the warming hut courtesy of those forgoing the slow march up the groomed tracks to Palmer Glacier. We would later reconvene with these folks as we waited for them to slowly ascend (and painfully) the final steep push to the summit where we were forced to withstand the putrid sulfuric stench billowing from the fumerol nearby. 

Eventually patience paid off and we ran up the steep slope through the Pearly Gates and traversed the knife edge to the abandoned summit. 

In the screaming wind we found solace as Rory and Pete slugged their summit brews while I tried to swallow my stomach back not capable of thinking about drinking the Longhammer IPA I'd packed up, (It was to be enjoyed with the company of a sandwich the following day.) 

Staving off altitude sickness in a state of insomnia left us stumbling during descent. Unfortunately for us the hard snow kept the convenience of glaciading--or sliding and self-arresting downhill--out of question. The snow was also bumpy, making a shovel ride a painful ferry, aside from the groomed trails, but the skiers weren't stoked about that.

After 26 sleepless hours, the parking lot never seemed to get any closer, but the thought of burritos, Dos Equis and bed kept our feet moving and eventually we found ourselves back in the concrete jungle where Rory downed another 5-Hour Energy. We were dead tired, dehydrated, hungry, and hurting... but most of all, stoked.